How Society is contributing to rape incidents : Need of the hour

Nirbhaya’s real name is out – Jyoti Singh Pandey. So many times I have sat down to write on this case but every time I did, I wrote 2-3 lines and deleted. Words can neither capture the atrocity committed nor express the anguish. Being a girl, I feel it all the more. Been reading so much about rape these days. Some good. Some bad.

So many times before this incident, we had heard about rape cases happening but none so gruesome. Newspapers are flooded with rape cases these days. It isn’t that the number of such cases has shot up all of a sudden but after Jyoti’s incident and the solidarity Delhites have shown against this issue, so many rape cases have been registered wherein the victim had been repeatedly raped in the past year or so. In the case of Jyoti (Nirbhaya), it was totally bad luck. I don’t find her at fault in ANY which way. She was not wearing skin fitting clothes, she was not alone but with a guy, who was well built, she was not travelling late night (it was just 9.15 pm!), and she was not at an isolated place. This case was a heinous one wherein no way I can say the victim was at fault. The bus they boarded had 4 passengers. (Out of the 6 culprits, 4 pretended to be passengers!). We all know she and her friend put up a brave battle but lost in the end. Victim’s friend has now come out in the open to tell his version of the story. Clubbing al the facts together, any fool can make out that police is at fault. They failed to do their duty. No matter how much they deny it they themselves know it. The passers by who saw both of them in that condition are also to be blamed. I understand that normal psyche is to think that someone is faking it in order to rob them but then what is the use of all the protests when you can’t help someone in need??? If not helped, they could have at least created an alarm which would have helped. I personally have not gone in any protest. I planned to go in one but couldn’t. Instead, my service has been to organize self defense workshop. Yes, I feel it’s important. Merely putting statuses on fb, twitter and showing solidarity won’t work. There HAS to be some action. Police and law come into picture during and after the crime but what about curbing it or preventing it?

Half of the time it happens because the girls are careless and act dumb. Yes, let’s face it. Going alone in isolated areas, walking on road totally engrossed with someone on phone or with headphones on, not being aware of who is behind or who in front. Again, I am saying in many cases, not all. We can first atleast focus on the ones which can be avoided? Even in our locality or familiar place, if someone passes a comment or slightly rubs the wrong way, we ignore it either with an attitude of just abusing him in our heart or making ugly face expressions or with a fearful feeling “Ignore, he might figure out my address…he might put acid” etc. Only few brave ones take some action. Apne hi mohalle mein darr gaye toh bahar kya??? Girls need to be given training on self defense and empowerment.

Secondly, parents. Many cases also happen because parents don’t keep a check on their kids. With growing popularity of facebook and bollywood craze, school girls or the ones in early 20s tend to be misled by many young guys and fall in their trap. Freedom should be given but with some accountability. I recently read a case where a class XIIth reported she made a boyfriend on facebook who took her out, mixed something in her drink and raped her. This age is highly vulnerable and guys easily deceive young ones.

Media plays a very vital role in this social stigma. Hats off to social media In Nirbahaya’s case. But media also has a social responsibility. I read so many rape cases recently which had no base. In a layman’s language, “Rape” is a situation of getting physical without consent. A story read that a women alleged rape charges on some MP who lured her saying he will get her many benefits. Now, in such a case the women agreed since she wanted those benefits. How is this rape??? In many cases, the victims have now come forward and reported rape cases wherein the culprits had promised to marry them. Aren't the women too at fault who decided to get physical before marriage? Emotions cannot be mixed with rationale decision making.

The plight is such that even 3 year kids and pregnant women are not spared! Such sick mentality has creep in the minds of uncultured men! Only spiritual education can bring about transformation in their minds. When we can work at the grass root level, nothing like it. If the mentality can change, everything else will follow. Yoga, meditation and spiritual knowledge can help them leave addictions and the tendency to commit such barbaric acts.   

Even if we take preventive measures as citizens, law and order condition in our country needs to be shaken up and strengthened. Our government is robbing our culture, our money and time and again showing how sick they are. I pray that this time the patriotic spirit doesn’t die out and leads to corrective measures.

Art of Living has come with a helpline for people with violent tendencies. This year is going to be a year of change.  

February3 , 2013 will see a revolutionary movement erupting – "Volunteer For A  Better India" www.vfabi.com  at Ramila Grounds , 4 pm – 7 pm

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Swati